What I Saw Last Week...

1. 9 (2009)
IMDB
* * * *
"9" is a well made animated film. It reminded me a bit of the cartoons of my youth like "Watership Down" and "The Secret of Nimh".

2. Amadeus Mozart (1995)
IMDB
* *
Another D'Amato hardcore flick. Pretty standard rip-off of Amadeus of sorts.

3. Black Devil Doll (2009)
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* * * *
Wow! Is this one an obnoxious treat or what. It's crude and crass but it's so damn fun.

4. Conan the Barbarian (1982)
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* * * *
Arnie was born to play this fantasy classic. A fine adaptation.

5. Dark Mirror (2007)
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* * *
Another mirror-related thriller this time dealing with a photographer who comes under the influence of a sinister mirror in a house that's not too kind to the artistic type.

6. Edges of Darkness (2009)
IMDB
* * *
The zombie apocalypse is upon us and this flick chronicles the story of several survivors. There's some interesting ideas floating around but it doesn't really jell too well in the end.

7. Gamer (2009)
IMDB
* * * 1/2
In the not-too-distant future convicts are used as pawns in a game show that offers them their freedom if they survive. "Gamer" is a bit of an update of "The Running Man" except that the cons are controlled via nano-technology by players. Interesting production design lends the film an interesting visual look.

8. I Love You, Beth Cooper (2009)
IMDB
* * *
A pretty standard, but still enjoyable teen comedy.

9. Macabre (1958)
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* * *
A relatively rare William Castle horror about a kidnapped girl buried alive and the small town rushing to rescue her and solve the mystery in five hours. Not as fun as some of his best (like "The Tingler") but still good.

10. Microwave Massacre (1983)
IMDB
* * *
The most interesting aspect of this entertaining but badly made no-budgeter is seeing the voice of those the "Frosty" TV specials (Jackie Vernon) cavorting with hookers. disposing of bodies and doing adult barbs.

11. MST3K: Werewolf (1999)
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* * *
Servo, Crow and Mike Nelson really have their work cut out for them with this piece O' crap. This one's a Staley Steamer if there was ever one.

12. Necrophilia: Fucking the Dead (2000)
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* *
Not as disgusting as the title would suggest. Definitely not on the same level as say "Nekromantik" but still it's hardcore and contains sex in cemeteries and with actors playing dead.

13. Pandorum (2009)
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* * * *
An excellent science fiction flick that was criminally overlooked at the theaters. I was expecting something along the lines of "Event Horizon" but got something much better.

14. Santa Buddies (2009)
IMDB
* *
Ho-hum family time waster.

15. Surrogates (2009)
IMDB
* * *
Bruce Willis stars in this sci-fi comic book adaptation that explorers the near future where the human race uses robot surrogates to live their lives. Free of disease or danger their lives are turned upside down when operators are killed along with their surrogates. Willis is a detective trying to solve the mystery.

16. Waterworld (1995) Extended Version
IMDB
* * * *
I was interested in what the extra 40 mins would add to the film. Particularly I was interested to see if any of the slaver storyline was used but it would seem that alas it was quite literally just the TV version. Unlike releases like "Halloween" that inserted the TV footage into a theatrical print it seems Universal took the lazy way out and presented it as is. No cussing. No bare stunt butt. Don't get me wrong, it offered some good stuff particularly towards the end but if a network must change the word "turd" to "toilet" somethings gotta be off. But yet ABC didn't have any probs with showing us Dennis Franz's ass!